Xpinionated

I’ve been told recently on several different occasions that I have to be the center of attention. Is that a good thing or a bad thing? Each time it happens, I can’t quite make out the tone of the person telling me. They have a smile on their face and they sound like they are beiing good natured but at the same time I feel defensive. I don’t think I HAVE to be the center of attention, it just happens in a lot of situations. I will readily admit that I can be pretty damn funny/silly/etc in social situations. And I will say some things out of left field in comedic efforts but I hardly think I am demanding any and everyone’s attention. I enjoy making people laugh. I enjoy laughing. Hell, I laugh at myself probably more than anything/anyone else. I will happily stop making jokes if there is someone that can make me laugh harder than I can make myself laugh. When that happens, I will no longer demand to be (not that I demand it, it just happens) the center of attention.

What makes this funny is that I consider myself to be shy. I was very shy when I started college but the friends I made there drew me out of my shyness. However, when I am by myself, which I am quite often, I rarely draw up a conversation with a stranger because I don’t feel like I’m any good at small talk and I’m not the kind to ask personal questions. I feel you’ll tell me what you want me to know and we’ll go from there. Is that being self centered??? Oh so much self analysis, so little time!!

Say the same thing over and over and over and over and over and over

I’m feeling very destructive today. I have managed to destroy my only set of headphones. They were on the glitch anyway but I completely dismantled them after one ear went out. That has to be the most annoying thing about headphones is when one ear goes out and less you hold the connector a particular way. You would think someone would invent headphones that could not do this. Or maybe they have I just manage to keep buying really cheap headphones. Well, you would think someone would invent really cheap headphones that could not do this.

How many times can you explain the same thing to the same person before cursing them out? Is there a rule or some kind of guide for these types of situations? I mean, seriously, at least twice a week for the past 5 months I have explained the same thing to the same person. I don’t know how else I can say it that will help this person understand. I may be flustered, oh no wait, pissed. Yes, pissed is what I meant….

~(@)~ 4-20-99: a Columbine site — Eric Harris, Dylan Klebold - Littleton, CO school shooters ~(@)~ Kind of weird that this guy follows Columbine so close but kind of interesting too.